We know we are in the wrong and that God’s teaching tells us to be pure and wait till we are married.However, every time we try to stay pure we end up slipping up.Are you prepared to stick it out for the long-haul with your future spouse as he or she is now? A little pre-marriage counseling and planning can go a long way.Are you willing to endure all kinds of trials with that person by your side? Before you marry, ensure your pastor or a godly older couple has spent some time with you, whether formally or informally.So much pain can be avoided by working through issues before that wedding day.
Have you asked and extended forgiveness for whatever sexual history you have accumulated? Is that person beginning to be like Christ in forgiving those who sin against him or her?
According to reporter Katherine Bindley, the website Indie ...
After love at first sight and a whirlwind romance, they quickly plan a wedding, exchange rings, and settle into a marriage that soon turns sour.
Also, is your future spouse chaste now or content to look at pornography and masturbate? By the time you are engaged, the “best foot forward” stage of dating has passed and you have learned many of the flaws and foibles of your future bride or groom. Some people enter marriage with the idea that their spouse is a project and that a little TLC will be all that person needs to be changed. While you of course hope that God will continue that work of grace, the fact is there may not be as much change as you’d like.
The stress of engagement and marriage planning will all but guarantee you will have a couple of good fights, and these will give you the opportunity to see if and how you can resolve them. Don’t expect that your spouse will some day be a completely different (and better) person.But in practice, it isn't what we many of us do, and understandably so: Calling the whole thing off is difficult, painful, and risky.